Friday, May 02, 2008

Thoughts

I've opened the window to do a new post many times in the last week. I've kept a few ramblings as drafts, but more often than not I just end up closing the window for lack of time or cogent thoughts to write. I've been thinking about ever so many things, and writing about none. The few moments snatched here and there are so often cut short by other things. I don't want to say interruptions, as Pumpkin and Dumpling should not be considered such.


But there are always little ones to hold, feed, & help that writing seems about impossible. I was copying some Scriptures into one of my Everything Books this morning before the boys woke up. I stared an an empty page, but just turned it as I could not gather my own thoughts. No matter, "His ways are higher than our ways, His thoughts higher than our thoughts".
I sat a wondered when the last time I had even held, much less wrote in, one of my books. Too long. I know that it has been a few weeks. I've been quietly living close to home. We've had lovely visits from kind friends during the days and have just entertained ourselves the rest of the time complete with our naps in the afternoons.
It is not always easy to get the necessary things done from 10-12 each morning, which is about the only time we leave the house- coordinating life between naps. It has been an expensive week though, with some necessary purchases that could be put off no longer, grocery shopping, and a trip to Target today. I've been avoiding Target like the plague, but the boys did need those diaper things. (I stocked up so that I don't have to go again until next month, I hope.)
We've gone out at some point everyday this week and I am about done in. I am amazed at how much energy growing babies and raising babies seems to take out of me. I am resting in the afternoons most days just to make it through to bedtime. This requires that I do more chores in the evenings though, which is something I've tried to avoid.
As I snatch a few minutes here and there for little projects and chores, I am trying to focus on what it is I am doing at each moment. I am trying to live in the moment and be more aware of each little thing, not mentally racing on to the next thing, or doing a bunch of things at once. My ablity and desire to multitask is gone. And that's ok. It'll all get done that needs to and what isn't completed must not be too important.
Life is...
a gift
a journey
loving
laughing
playing
tickling
savoring.
It is not about...
racing around
accomplishments
acquiring
competing
perfection.
Life is good.
Now it's time to go rotate the laundry.

4 comments:

Mary Isabella said...

Beautiful!!!!

Sheila said...

HUGS!

Two in diapers is hard. I was in that position for a long time since my oldest didn't potty train completely until just after his 4th birthday and his brother is 21 months younger.

Don't feel guilty about your afternoon rest. That is a wonderful time to recharge.

I love what you said at the end of your post!

Kate said...

Hiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!!
Kudos to you. All I know about parenting I read from a book; however, in all my studies, the books never state how much hard work it really is. I played mom for two weeks while my niece was recovering from a surgery and I was so exhausted! All you women with children who have time to do the extras and be as creative as you are just amaze me.
Sometimes its great to take a break, and it is certainly understood.
I thought about you yesterday as we gathered after the Beth Moore conference in the Springs...your presence was certainly missed.
I love how you think of the best in the midst of the all the other stuff...you're a blessing.
~Kate

Davene said...

I always enjoy reading your thoughts! I especially related to your sentence, "I am amazed at how much energy..."

Enjoy those rests...and don't feel a bit guilty!!! :)

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